ic inbox

[enarms]

"John Watson's phone. I'm either busy or ignoring you, in which case you'll know who you are. Leave a message."

(text | voice | video | snail mail | action | honestly whatever)

Comments

[prettier]

Or get them to beat you.

I need an opinion. Which is better: natural feel or longest lasting? Medically.

[enarms]

Medically, whichever's most likely to stop you catching anything.

[prettier]

[IMAGE UPLOADING]

[IMAGE UPLOADING]

Hmm, no. Neither of them mention that.

[enarms]

Oh, lube. The key info there is water vs silicone . From a medical standpoint I'd recommend silicone: plus sides are it's longer lasting (aptly named), stays slick, gentle on skin, can be used in water. Downsides are it's a pain to wash out and it can't be used with silicone toys.

Water based is alright for general use, fine vaginally, fine with toys, less ideal for anal. Absorbs into the skin, causes swelling, can result in increased micro tears.

[prettier]

Yes, I've got google. I've also had sex before. Jesus.

Out of those two. Which one's better for groups?

[enarms]

Ask a basic question get a basic answer.

They don't actually give us Best Lube 101 in med school.

[ professional detachment professional detachment professional detachment ]

Again, I'd recommend silicone.

[prettier]

Right, so silicone. More expensive, though.

Do you think a gallon's enough for say... a hundredish, for an evening?

[enarms]

[ i hate :) you :) i hate you :) ]

Couldn't say. You'd have to check with our sexual health team.

[prettier]

Do they have statistics for that? How about if we were lubing them all over?

I don't know, might take two gallons. What do you think?

[enarms]

I think this stopped being anything resembling a medical question at least two texts ago.

[prettier]

Which lube is safest if it gets in your eyes?

See, now I'm rethinking water based.

[enarms]

Or you could avoid giving one another lube eye baths.

[prettier]

Right, but these things happen when you're going for the prize. People get overexcited.

[enarms]

Lube in the eyes levels of overexcited. Right. You kids have fun.

[prettier]

I'm buying it for work, obviously, so the fun's not really for me.

[enarms]

[ ?????????????? ]

When did you become an official orgyniser?

1/3

[prettier]

It's not an orgy. Christ, John. Sunday night's Slippery Pole night at Cupid's.

[prettier]

Oh, right, I got a second job.

[prettier]

I mean it doesn't pay anything exactly, but they like me and the drinks are free. Want to come?

1/2

[enarms]

If you'd just said

[enarms]

I think I need a good twenty after that why not

1/2

[prettier]

I enjoyed our talk, though, I love it when you talk about increased microtears. Really gets me - mm.

[prettier]

So it's a bar in the New Quarter. Cupid Stunt's. Just tell the drag queen on the door you're 'That John Watson'.

[enarms]

You're a shit, did you know? [ of course you did. which doesn't make him any less ready to at least marginally profit off the near inevitable drawing out of his own misery ] See you there.

[prettier]

[It's a gay bar in the new quarter, oddly (or perhaps not, given how flexible the city's intake seem to be) one of the only establishments of its kind. A rainbow flag flies over the door and the obligatory Minogue classic filters out into the street. The drag queen at the door has six inch stilettos and a full beard. She raises her eyebrows in bored recognition at John's name and nods him through with a sigh of Grecian 2000, darling. Your temples will thank me.

Freddie's at the bar, kneeling up on a stool and leaning halfway onto it, laughing with a shot glass caught between his teeth. He spots John the way you'd spot a black sheep in an ivory herd, and swallows the drink with a backward tilt of his head.]

John! Come over, I've been lining them up.