cuddlr

[enarms]

John Watson (41) Ex-military doctor. Yes, that John Watson.

✓       ✕

YES / MATCH / TICK
<span style="font-family: times; font-size:40px; color:#2EB82E;">✓</span>


NO / CROSS
<span style="font-family: times; font-size:40px; color:#CC0000;">✕</span>

Comments

[enarms]

Recent enough that I was taking my GCSEs when they were filling out your birth certificate.

[ that's not an answer at all but also he's just checked your profile kiddo ]

[prettier]

Was that meant to make sense? And I can read, I just don't know any fourty-year-olds who use a pic from the last five years.

[enarms]

It's recent.

[prettier]

Really? Well fuck me. Got any more?

[enarms]

I actually don't here, no. Not much of a picture taker.

[prettier]

See, now that's a mistake for a start. You need at least three to start off on one of these, four if you're into the whole dickpic thing which - I'm not, honestly. Call me traditional, I like a surprise.

[enarms]

[ !!!!! ahahahahaha right then ]

I don't think I'll get that invested with it but thanks for the tip.

[prettier]

There's no sense having something if you're not going to use it properly. I could help you, if you wanted.

[enarms]

How so?

[prettier]

Well they can't all be selfies, you'll look like you've got no friends. I could help you take some. You've got the 'I don't look too much like a serial killer' one sorted. So you need another one, bit more sexy, proves you haven't just picked the first normal looking bloke you found on google images. And then if you go with women you need one in a suit. If you go with men, shirtless pic to send on request.

[enarms]

Bit of an expert, aren't you?

[ still. still. ]

A friend of an acquaintance is opening up a tailor soon. I won't have anything until then. I'll message you.

[prettier]

I've looked at a lot of rubbish profiles.

A friend of an acquaintance. Well, you're quite the social butterfly. And that's fine. We could probably fuck after, if you wanted.

[enarms]

Decided I liked it better in the chrysalis.

Good of you. I'll bear that in mind.

[prettier]

See that's why I left you a tick. That enthusiasm.

I'm Freddie.

[enarms]

I know. I can read too.

[ aren't you glad you're here Freddie ]

[prettier]

[Oh, ever so.]

Can you? Because I heard read aloud software was popular, you know, for the elderly.

[enarms]

[ you're bad ]

I've kept my eyes sharp.

[prettier]

Good to know some things are still functioning. How about your bedside manner?

[enarms]

A little rough around the edges.

[prettier]

Well, some people don't mind that.

[enarms]

Some people don't.

[prettier]

So why ex?

[enarms]

Not much use to the army with a limp and a bollocksed shoulder. Fine now.

[prettier]

Were you shot?

[enarms]

No, I ran into a low-hanging branch. A sharp twig got me.